Wednesday, December 16, 2015

A Tale of Two Universities

My conflict with higher education is about as fickle as the war on international terrorism; without being able to define the problem, it is almost impossible to discover the solution.

That hasn't stopped me from experimenting with it, though. After all, my personal philosophy has been that it is better to do something, and get it wrong, than it is to do nothing.

Two colleges, three declared majors, five semesters, three dropped semesters, eighty-some odd credits, zero degrees, and seven years later; I feel like my academic and occupational goals are more chaotic than ever. At least I always performed well academically, but this is only small consolation. It is difficult to resist the stigma of being a habitual quitter--quitting my construction job to go back to college, then subsequently quitting college to work construction again. Rinse and repeat. Quitting is the only thing I appear to do well.

It is not for want of ambition, though. I believe it is instead for lack of conviction. If I could only believe that college opened the door to a brighter picture, believe me, I would still be there. I love learning, and being challenged by tests and writing assignments. I learned much from every class I ever took. The problem is, I am too critical, and also stingy. I simply did not believe that the education I received was worth the price I paid for it.

This changed the dynamics somewhat. If college was about getting a degree, rather than an education it would be another matter. The truth is, I already make decent money working construction, and becoming rich really isn't one of my big life goals. So it's all over but the crying, I guess. Apart from perhaps lamenting that I could have "been something" if I had gone to college, there is really little else to say. If education and knowledge is what I want, then I will have to be more disciplined to obtain it without being guided through a college. On the other hand, I should have more resources available.

So there's that.

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